


What's Up, Old Man?

by caidanu (Zanya)



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Humor, M/M, Mild Language, Sass, Sexual Humor, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-06
Updated: 2016-03-06
Packaged: 2018-05-25 02:25:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6176611
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zanya/pseuds/caidanu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was another ordinary day for Naruto... what better way to spend it than bugging his boyfriend at work?</p>
            </blockquote>





	What's Up, Old Man?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Daydreamer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daydreamer/gifts).



Naruto sat down on the other side of Itachi’s desk. Jiraiya had finally let him out of work for lunch since they had been busy all morning settling on their new book deal. The quiet sound of Itachi typing at his computer filled the room. The lights were all turned on, making the ivory walls seem bright in the artificial lighting, and the blinds were closed to keep out the glare of the sun. 

Deciding that his presence wouldn't be acknowledged unless he said something, Naruto leaned forward, his elbows scooting along the dark oak desk, and grinned. “Hey, Itachi, what do you wanna do tonight?” 

“You, if you’re lucky.” Itachi kept on typing, not bothering to look at Naruto but from the angle where he sat, a small smile could be seen. 

“Feh, shouldn’t you be the lucky one? People would line up to get some of this if they weren’t so afraid of you.” Naruto pointed to himself and chuckled. “But seriously, wanna do something fun? Maybe go out? It’s been awhile since we’ve had a date night.”

“Sure. Have Sasuke make some calls and get reservations for us,” Itachi calmly replied while he continued to type. 

“No, I don’t want Sasuke to do it.” Naruto waved the suggestion off and scowled. “He’ll just be a jerk face about it and make shitty little comments to me.”

“It could be worse,” Itachi chuckled darkly. “I could have Sai help you out.”

“To hell with that! Sai’s even worse. He’ll definitely make shitty comments. And probably insult my dick.” Naruto huffed and crossed his arms over his chest. “Well, how bout I do it then.”

“Do you have to use such crass language while I’m working?” Itachi did stop typing and glanced over at him. “And sure, knock yourself out.”

“You know you love it, old man.” Naruto’s grin widened. “What would you do without me bugging you all the time at work?”

“Get my work done?” Itachi supplied. “And if I’m so old, what’s that say about you?”

“It only means that I’m a—”

“Gay gigolo?” Itachi’s lips faintly tilted up into a smirk as he hit print. 

The soft chugging sound of the printer momentarily distracted their conversation. Once the machine stopped printing, Itachi’s comment caught up to Naruto’s brain. 

“Hey… I am not a whore.” Naruto pointed to himself, his finger trailing downward in the air. “You get all this for free. And besides, I’d feel guilty charging and old man like you for sex and blowing through your retirement fund.”

“Are you sure you want to be announcing that so boldly?” Itachi pulled the paper from the printer and turned to Naruto. “Some people might get the wrong idea about our relationship.”

“Why is Sakura listening in again?” Naruto quickly glanced towards the glass that separated Itachi’s office from Sakura’s reception area. “Can’t you just tell her to turn that off?”

“When is she _not_ listening? Besides, no matter what I'd say to her, she would listen in anyway.” Itachi neatly stacked some paperwork on his desk into two orderly piles before going through them and sorting them out. “So what are we doing tonight?”

Naruto sighed and leaned back in the chair. “Why do I always have to pick?”

“Because, it’s pointless for me to choose when you’re pickier than I am, and you did offer to make the reservations.” Itachi pointed out while reading over the papers. “I’m happy with whatever, but you on the other hand only like to eat at certain places or see certain movies.”

“That’s not true! I’ll like whatever you pick,” Naruto griped. “You like cool things… sometimes.” 

“Okay, let’s go to that new playhouse on Chestnut,” Itachi suggested. “I hear they have a great theatrical system. According to Sasuke, the sound is amazing.”

“Alright, alright… you have a point,” Naruto conceded. “But that was a loaded example. You could have picked something else, you know. Something you know I’d like.” 

“Where’s the fun in that?” Itachi stopped organizing his papers and stood up. He took off his glasses and set them down on the desk before pulling his suit coat from the back of his chair. He quickly slipped it on and buttoned it up. 

“Hey where’re you going?” Naruto pushed the chair back and twirled it around, his foot purposely catching on the cream carpeting so that he could swing the chair in the opposite direction. 

“I have a meeting in conference room A at one.” Itachi straightened his tie and then tucked the folders on top of his desk into his briefcase. “Besides, you should probably get back to work before Jiraiya skins your hide for being late again.”

“Like that old bastard has any room to talk.” Naruto stopped swinging the chair and stood up, positioning himself so Itachi would have to walk past him to get to the door. “He’s probably still at the pool ogling anything he sets his eyes on.”

Itachi walked up to him and brushed a few stray hairs out of Naruto’s face before resting them on his shoulders. “And you call me a dirty old man.”

“That’s because you are.” Naruto leaned into the touch and smiled. “If people only knew how dirty you were.”

Leaning closer, Itachi softly pressed his lips to Naruto’s. The kiss only lasted a few moments. Enough to tease but not fully satisfy. “We could always stay in. I can think of plenty of things you can eat.”

Naruto softly laughed and straightened out Itachi’s ponytail. “See, that’s what I mean. Dirty old man.”

“That may be true, but you keep coming back for more.” Itachi slid past Naruto, towards the door. “I have to go. See you at home?”

“Sure, maybe I’ll text you later with the plans.” Naruto followed Itachi out of his office and closed the door behind him. “Good luck at your meeting.”

Sakura waved to him and gave him a knowing smile. Maybe he would stay and chat with her awhile longer since technically he could take an hour for lunch. Jiraiya would get over it. 

Itachi started walking towards the conference rooms before turning around. “Naruto. Don’t send a text. Surprise me instead.”

**Author's Note:**

> This was a bday ficlette I wrote for a friend of mine a few years back and then totally forgot to officially post it after showing her. Nothing fancy. Simply some fun Itachi and Naruto shenanigans ^^


End file.
